Why won’t you just get over him? There are tons of guys out here waiting for you to notice,“ they pried relentlessly but as usual, I just smile. They wouldn’t understand. No one will understand unless they wear my heart. I did tried but I couldn’t shake him out of my system. I sleep and my last thoughts would still be him. I wake up and he would be my first thoughts. I see him everywhere although I haven’t seen him yet. It’s quite a wonder to myself, too, how I am so in love with him but I was so replaceable for him.

I am holding on to that possibility that one day he will realise no one will love him the way I did, no one will take care of him the way I can, no one will understand him the way I deeply and profoundly do, and no one will ever feel the way I do feel about him. I want to make sure I was still there when it does happen. I want to make sure that he knows I understand that he has to lose me to realise what he had.

“You ever loved someone that feels like you don’t wholly belong to yourself anymore?” I wanted to say but I know they still won’t understand.